Here I am again. It’s been awhile. I always say I’ll be consistent and then I’m not! Life just gets in the way and I talked myself out of what I want to post. I become disobedient to God by not doing what he has asked of me. This topic is a big one for me because I have to be completely real and vulnerable. ￼I’m opening myself up to judgement. Tonight (10/25/19) God told me, write the blog. You’ve been sitting on this far too long. It isn’t about me, it’s about him! Wow, wow, wow!! So here we go!
This is about how God will always welcome you back home with open arms. Almost two months ago I finished these classes called freedom at my church. They were about breaking free from the strongholds in your life. A lot of things came up during that class that I thought I was over but I wasn’t. God wanted to heal me but the enemy wanted to use it against me.
I finished the classes but I finished thinking I couldn’t do what God called me to do knowing I was still dealing with certain issues in my life. I felt that I wasn’t qualified anymore. That God needed to use someone else.
I felt the enemy really attacking me. I stopped going to church and serving, partly because of work but on the days I was able to go to church I wouldn’t. I’d watch online but wouldn’t really be paying attention. I stopped caring about these free bible classes a friend was offering me! I stopped reading my word and I hardly ever prayed anymore. Prayer became a big part of my life, I did it every day on my way to work. That 15 min drive was time between God and I, so to not have that time anymore really played a role in my life.
I started listening to who the devil said I was and forgetting who God says I AM. I was letting the lies and the insecurities define me.
I had went and saw the movie overcomer with two of my friends and that movie is all about Identity. Who you think you are VS who God says you are. It really moved me and got me thinking about my life. Later that week I went to the bridge young adult September rally. ( shoutout to the way world outreach!!) During worship I really felt God. I heard him tell me “ Come home “. I instantly started crying because it’s what I needed to hear. “ Come home, I still love you. “. That night I had to just stop and surrender to God again. I had to let the devil know he couldn’t have me and just when he thought he did, God brought me back to life.
That night I went home and I opened up my bible to Ephesians 1 just like Hannah did in the movie. I wrote down everything God said I was. I needed to write it and speak it over myself. I wasn’t who the enemy said I was, I had to let him know, I was Gods child. I was chosen.
I went and saw that movie once more with some of my other friends and it had so much meaning this time!
The enemy will always come to attack. To kill steal and destroy but just like the movie said. “When you find your Identity in the one who created you, your whole perspective changes! “
I didn’t want to write this post at first because sometimes as a leader you think you have to have it all together. That’s not true, The Bible says we all have sinned and we all fall short.
God already knows everything though and he knew this moment would happen and he knew I would come back.
I was reminded that the Bible also says in Romans 11:29 “ For Gods gifts and his call can never be withdrawn “
It didn’t matter that I stepped away for a moment the call and purpose on my life was still the same. It couldn’t be taken away. I was still qualified to do all the work God called me to do.
I’m here to encourage you that no matter what happens in your walk, God will always welcome us home with open arms. He is a good good father. This walk isn’t always easy but we must pick up our cross daily and deny our flesh .
Guilt, shame, condemnation does not come from God. It comes from the enemy. He will make you feel all these things to keep you bound, so you won’t call on a sister or brother for help. Remember, God loves all the time. He is the same yesterday, today and forever.
I write things about my life in hopes that it will reach someone going through the same things who needs help. God doesn’t want us to be stuck in torment but to feel his peace and love. His mercies are made new everyday. So if that’s you, you’re stuck it’s okay, let him pull on your heart strings and come home to the father who has never left your side!
I love you and so does Jesus♥️
Until next time 💫✨